Verily, with every hardship there is ease.

Verily, with every hardship there is ease.

Nowadays people have taken the Divine acts in their own hands. We fail to conceive and forget that Allah Almighty alone is Supreme Judge of all the judges on the earth whose Command exposes, unveils and conceals the intentions and affairs of his creature. We've always heard that "we live in a judgemental society." People are always going to judge you, no matter what you do, what you wear, what you say, in terms of inevitable pursuits of life. Even they judge your beliefs too. We are certainly very good lawyers for our own mistakes, but very good judges for the mistakes of others.

 I am sure many of us have these 'wolf in sheep's clothing' kind of friends in our social circle, who show up their real faces in the hour of need. Vigilance is required for such false friends. They come to you as your well wishers on the foreground, but in the background are ferocious wolves. And eventually at some point they unintentionally show their true colours and the mask on their face falls off with complete exposure and thus treat you then altogether differently.

Having said that i'll come to my personal experience, i recently had with such a friend. As friends often share things with each other, so did i with my university friends. One of whom had always been so open about her family and her life. Having seen that she trusts me, i had put my trust in her. Being already quiet gullible and vulnerable, i often shared things with her.

When recently my little brother who is only 16 years of age, accidentally shot his friend while helping him and snatching the gun from his hand, got himself in trouble. He was in police custody when i asked her after telling the whole story, to make dua.

To this she was grieved and saddened because she knew my brother personally and knew how innocent and tamed he was. But then while consoling me she told me that its Allah's curse that has befallen upon me.

She said: 'My Tai amma says its the 'NAHOOSAT' in your house that has lead you people to this accident, she even keeps lecturing me too and i often feel irritated but now after seeing your position, i feel that she is right.'

She said that i am very modern and fashionable and i shall now put an end to this and start living a simple life. Its not a good thing to be 'like this' and it takes away barkat from the house.

I didn't get what 'like this' meant? She didn't give me any islamic reference to all this 'Allah's curse' she was implementing on me but only her tai's say. I don't say that I'm the most or even a bit of a pious muslimah but i am not such a sinner too. I do the usual things the other girls do, Watch movies, listen to songs, or occasionally hang out with friends, wearing fashionable clothes. Things she even herself does.

In Quran - Surah Al Nisa : "If you keep away from major prohibitions (to you), he will wipe off your preliminary evil (inclinations) and We will admit you to a place and state of great honour." 

So the belief what I gather from all this is close to and inherent in some other religion which Islam does not accept.    

I said: 'But you know i do cover up properly outside and i pray 5 times a day. I know i may not be that pious but if Allah was to show his anger in this way then all the people on the face of earth would be going through such calamities. And Allah also says i test the ones's i love. AND I PUT TO TEST AND EXAMINATION THOSE WHO CAN BEAR IT" meaning thereby that they simultaneously pray to God, Seek Indulgence, take the calamity as the will of the God, do not turn out as thankless as many other blessings and bounties of the God Almighty are also available and the God Almighty might have tested his most loved to see how they react in the difficult and hard time.  Islam is a religious of forgiveness, repentance, acceptance and there is nothing that one can take as granted to curse anyone for a solitary act without discerning things leading to an act to establish the same as either a deliberate, neglectful, sinful or otherwise.

She was still persistent and said:  'But tai amma insists that i take her to your house and she talks to your mother about it. She is always after me even when I'm only one sister but you are four, no wonder all your sins combined has brought this calamity upon your brother. The burden of the 'nahoosat' of four is bringing azaab on the family'.

How many prophets had four and how many fours are in the world and as to whether Quran, Sunnah or any argument through any Islamic propounder or scholar on the touchstone of sources of Islam has accepted the analogy advanced. Pause to ponder and decide.

I was speechless at her ignorance and haughtiness. Maybe she was so frustrated by the lecturing of her tai, that she got started on me. After all judging other does not define who they are, it defines who you are. How could she say such things to a person whose already going through such a big tragedy and is in a trance. And above all, the very next day of the incident. Except for consoling me, she started agitating and depressing me.

She acted do ungraciously she didn't even consider even for a moment that she was saying all this to the person who tried to help her being who she is this day. I was the one who persuaded her on start wearing qameez shalwar. She never wore dupatta because she disgusted it until she became friends with me. Before she used to wear immoderate dresses (according to her own self) her family believes in 'the less the better'. Except for being thankful that she only started observing abaya and hijab in university because she was inspired by me.

I taught her how to pay respect to teachers, because even they complained that haughtiness and ignorance is largely attributed to her, being my friend i thought it my insult because a person is known by the company he keeps. I always helped her towards the right path, in the politest manner so she doesn't feel that i think inferior of her.

Even after all that what right did she have to judge me and my family even when she knew not even a thing about my personal life. And to top it all of, insists upon bringing her tai to my house, who is a person unknown to me. Her own father being an educated man but a drunkard and she was proud of him being a secular and having no affiliations with religion. How does a person like that have a right to judge others on being a good or a bad muslim?

How can one be so ungracious and brusque even after you've been more then a soul sister and a guide to them, who've helped them in flourishing. How gross it is that a person is suffering and you are putting salt on their wounds, forgetting your own neck is in the water of sins and you are in disarray.

Hazrat Omar R.A said: "The most beloved of people to me is he that points out my flaws to me." 
But he also said, "Learn knowledge and teach it to the people. Learn how to have yourselves an aura of dignity and peace. Be humble to those that have taught you knowledge, and be humble to those that you have taught knowledge. And do not be haughty scholars; otherwise, your knowledge will not rise due to your ignorance."

Theres a very thin line between counselling and dictating and making others feel inferior and pathetic in their own eyes. Never tell a person "Allah hates him and he is being cursed by the Lord, thats why he is going through rough times." But In fact remind them that Allah gives the hardest battles to his strongest soldiers. Allah tests those he loves, so don't despair if you're going through tough times, Allah wants to test your faith. For after every hardship comes ease. Be polite to them in their hard times. Just a few kind words can do wonders. Kind words do put them to ease and you lift the burden off their hearts, trust me it does mean a lot to the sufferer.